Lying in bed this morning I felt a small kick.. and then another. This isn't out of the ordinary but this morning I opened my eyes and said,
Hi baby, to myself. Tomorrow is a big day for us. It's the big ultrasound.. you know the one where we find out if this baby is a boy or a girl.
At times I wonder why it even matters to so many, the gender. Anya has showed us that although she is a girl she loves dinosaurs, trains, mud, digging, and running around like a maniac. She does still let me dress her up like a doll, wear bows, play with her baby dolls, and calls any ruffle a tu-tu. However, her favorite color is blue and out of the entire Disney Store yesterday she chose to buy Ursula with her gift card she received on her birthday. I love how she is. I love that she doesn't sleep in only princess dresses and that she doesn't only wear the color pink. If that is who she chose to be, however, you know that we would be smiling and embracing all of the pink glitter.
No matter, girl or boy, this baby is joining our family and I know he or she will be bringing so much of his/her own personality. Maybe this one will love musicals, baseball, ballet, or skiing. Maybe this one will be shy and artsy. We just don't know. I do know that we will love him or her completely as we do with Anya. I do know that while I was in our quiet home this morning, as I felt our baby move I had some images.
I saw us as a family of four all snuggled up in bed early in the morning before anyone wants to get ready for the day. I heard the whispers and giggles that will someday come from the kids room as they share so much more than we understand. I imagined us cheering on our baby as he or she takes the first steps. I saw our two kids under a tent with flashlights and sleeping bags pretending to camp out in the house. I saw family movie nights where we all somehow fit on the couch together, popcorn and all. I see a complete family with so many memories to make up ahead.
I can't wait to see our little baby on that screen tomorrow. I can't wait to know a little more about you, baby, whether you are a girl or a boy. We already can't wait for you to join us. We are so blessed to have you. It might be a little crazy here but I think you will fit right in.